"You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection." -- Buddha.
Almost all people in the world suffer from low-esteem at some point of time in life though everybody is born with a perfect self-image or idea about oneself. Children are born with all beauty, goodness, talents, abilities, love, health, wealth and happiness but as they grow up they get influenced through their associations that they lose their originality. Because of this they feel low about their self-worth. Low self-esteem drains their energy and enthusiasm that they feel depressed and angry.
A healthy self-esteem can be cultivated within oneself by right understanding and education. There are many kinds of disguises where people usually hide themselves today in the world. They hide in cosmetic products, plastic surgery, fine dresses, shoes, cars, houses, alcohol, drugs, cigarettes and jobs. These things temporarily help them feel better but again the feeling of low self-worth overpowers them. Here are some ways to heal oneself.
1. Accept and Love yourself from within first.
When you were formed in your mother's womb, your parents designed you with lots of love, care, ability, enthusiasm and energy. Your mom carried you wherever she went for nearly 9 months and she talked to you telling you how much she loved and waited to see you. At first, you didn't lack anything. I can relate this because our son was conceived with lots of love and care. My wife and I loved him so much when our son was in the womb. We would talk to him, play with him, and he would respond by kicking the stomach and we could feel that. It was a wonderful experience for us. Our son didn't lack anything. He got all our love and care. And even now, he is getting enough love and attention from us. He is two and half doing excellent. So there is no point that you lack love or attention. But why should there be low self-esteem?
You have got to accept and love yourself from within first so that your internal representation of yourself will be corrected and reflected outside what you are inside. When you see yourself from within you are marvellous and wonderful and same thing will be displayed outside. You must love yourself first and accept what you are, how you are because you are uniquely created.
People don't accept themselves and don't love because they compare themselves with others. They don't feel confident when something is crooked. You must never be afraid of other's opinions or ideas about you because they are different and they may perceive you differently and make comments about you. You shouldn't feel bad or take their opinions to heart because they don't tell the truth. They don't know you. External beauty, figure is a hype created by the media. Media is biased and undemocratic. You must accept and believe yourself for what you are. Never question your worthiness.
Don't fear whether others will accept and love you or not, instead love yourself, treat yourself and value yourself as a priceless gift. "The way you treat yourself sets the standard for others." Dr Sonya Friedman. As long as you have a positive and healthy outlook about yourself, nobody will dare to intimidate you. You must act confidently, talk confidently and conduct your daily business confidently without any fear.
Many times, others' opinions or remarks are the mirrors of what we internally represent within us, what we self-talk within us and what we fear. To your astonishment, the same things are presented to us as a response of your own internal representation. What happens to us occurs because we attract them knowingly or non-deliberately. Learn to love yourself from within and see yourself as the most confident person. You are valuable, priceless and precious.
Alwed Ekka
Guide Coach Mentor
